Feeling Exposed

I don’t want to talk,
there’s nothing to say,
I’ll sleep over here,
you go your way.

The ache in my chest,
when you speak, it grows,
I cannot hide, 
you already know.

But I wish I could retreat,
the words, take back,
and smile and hug,
keep up the act.

For what is there to reach,
when hope is fleeting,
’tis better to find shelter,
thank risk a beating.

I can’t do this anymore,
you’re too close to my heart,
and though I long to be closer,
it’s more familiar, apart.

My stomach is in knots,
I lie alone here in bed,
like I sat in that pew,
with the war in my head,
but not only my head,
it’s deep in my soul,
the track on repeat,
that I’ll never be whole. 

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