I’m Just In the Way

When the last prayer has been prayed,
and all that is left is silence,
It’s not hope or peace that meet me there –
Rather desolation and violence 

The citing of ‘tomorrow,’
was once my hope and stay, 
but the burden has grown too heavy, too  dark,
to carry another day

Efforts, futile and words of vanity,
my heart not getting stronger, 
as shame and blame corral its function
I care not that it beats any longer 

Exhausted, abased by those who should love
My cry on this page not my lips –
Because what fucking good are any petitions, 
if the demons won’t loosen their grip?

Should I go down to the sea and never return, 
My life would be left a vague story –
But freedom it seems would be found if I died 
at least blame could then cease with the gory.

Some wounds simply won’t heal,
they’re killing me slowly each day –
and what they can’t reach, my mind will help finish,
with those whom I’m just in the way…

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