Under the Covers 

For those days, when you just want to hide from the world… 
Under the Covers

They say it’s darkest before dawn
But I disagree 
For all too often
The dawn is scariest for me

Whether I’ve slept soundly 
Or tossed and turned 
I wake from the nightmare 
Only to learn 
The box that entraps me
Is worse than the dream
Everything that I’m holding
Is coming apart at the seams

I’ll flash you a smile
The small talk is sincere
But I’ve just come from the covers 
I’m numbing my fears 

It’s all overwhelming
The other shoe drops
But there it is again, and again
It won’t stop

Relentless and pounding
Not sparing a fist
The shot to my sternum
Pre-planned, on the list 

I crawl through the mud 
Looking for ground
That will hold me steady
But I don’t make a sound
Scared if I move 
To the right or the left 
The ache of the living
Will feel more like death

So I tuck what I can
Into glittery bins
Put checks by the duties 
For Redemption from sin

Find some way to breathe
Til the house is at rest
Nothing good enough
Though I gave it my best

Alone and reminded
Of demons who hover 
I decide the best place 
Is under my cover  
 

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7 thoughts on “Under the Covers 

      1. I get it. I hope you’re not trying to navigate it (or experience it) alone. (Even though the being alone can seem somehow so comforting).

      2. i was trying with someone. then someone else. it never got better. so i sort of am. I’m too tired now. I’ve been through so many but I’m a complicated case because i have other ailments and a combination of traumas.

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